Monday, February 26, 2007

Dark Lumps (Variation/Rewrite)

Sarah spotted the first of the pimples on her forearm and frowned. She has never gotten one here before. Still frowning she pinched the pimple. Sharp pain immediately burst up and down her arm, but the lump did not pop. She wiped the tears from her eyes and tried again, this time gritting her teeth against the pain. This didn't last long, however. The pain was just too intense to keep trying. She plopped down at the end of her bed and couldn't stop herself from weeping.

She absently scratched the top of her head, and more pain erupted through her. Sarah gasped and shot off her bed. She ran to the bathroom down the hall and looked in the mirror. She had to wipe tears out of her eyes before she could see anything...she wished she hadn't. Like the one on her forearm three more pimples stood on her brow, just above her left eye, one on her chin, and another on the lower lobe of her right ear, like a grotesque earring. She gaged at the sight of these and turned away from the mirror, she didn't dare inspect the top of her head. She didn't really need to anyway. She knew what she'd find up there.

Reluctantly she turned back to the mirror. Tears trickled down her cheeks. What's happening to me, she wondered. It was then she realized that the pimples didn't look like ordinary pimples. They lifted out of her skin like round, dark, decaying teeth. She stepped closer to the mirror. God, this was gross. But the more she looked the more she knew these were not pimples at all, but something else. Something worse, if that's even possible.

The skin on the tip of her nose began to ripple and wriggle, as if many tiny worms had somehow gotten inside that little nub. Absolute horror froze her where she stood. And, before her eyes, a dark lump the size of kernel of corn rose from the skin on the tip of her nose. Sarah began to tremble. Oh God, oh Jesus, she thought She found she couldn't even speak.

Here's an easy one. Just rewrite the story and add an ending. Easy as that. This is just a blueprint for an even greater story...and I can't wait to see what some of you can come up with.

8 comments:

Charles Gramlich said...

This is a great setup for a story. Not sure I'll have time to fiddle here but it's a good opening situation.

Lucas Pederson said...

I understand the time thing, Charles, it seems there isn't enough. I'm sure whatever you write will be fine. Thanks for stopping by.

Stewart Sternberg said...

This is a grotesque start, which is a good thing. I will not be doing an assignment at this time. Hell, I won't even be doing one on my own blog.

I can't wait for the end of March, when the school year starts to slow down to a manageable pace.

Lucas Pederson said...

Thanks Stewart. That's fine. I understand folks are busy. I just thought I'd throw it out there and see if anyone wanted to give it a whirl. Guess no one does, and that's all right. Thanks for stopping by.

Christina said...

Eyyyyyyu! Gross. I always love reading these things you come up with. I hope your other writing is coming along nicely.

Lucas Pederson said...

I'll take that as a complement, Christina. Thanks. Yeah, my serious writing is going well. I've got several short stories out, circulating. I'm still working on my novel, which is more like a rewrite than anything since I wrote the original in a couple notebooks while on breaks at work. That's going very well, I might add. Should be done by the middle of summer, fingers croseed and knock on wood. Anyway. Thanks for taking a gander. Later.

Travis said...

Glad to hear that your writing is moving forward.

This story was creepy, BTW. I've come back a couple of times and read it again.

I'm struggling at the moment with a cliche scene - I've purposely written it in, trying to establish characters around it enough to make the cliche disappear. Not sure if I'm succeeding, or just writing myself into a corner.

I guess time will tell.

Lucas Pederson said...

Thanks Travis.
And keep working on that scene. I find it works to just move on to something else for a couple days, that way your mind is focused on something else, then go back to the scene. IT might make things a little bit easier. Give it a try and see what happens.